In case we were wondering whether there's a problem with inclusive language being our default; Steve Irwin in 1999:

...and he...well, they...

The Subway meat-free meatball is not good. It doesn't help that the person who served me seemed to have never made a sandwich before, but the meatball itself was like soggy, compacted sawdust. Their adverts that show people pretending to be worried that they're eating meat are borderline false advertising. It's almost entirely flavourless, but they've done their best to try and mask it with the other ingredients in the sandwich. I do like their Sriracha, though. Don't know how long they've been doing that.

The Greggs vegan steak bake, on the other hand, is very good. Exactly how I remember steak bakes from when I was 18. On reflection, that is nearly 17 years ago, which makes me feel somewhat sad.

I should point out that these were two separate meals. I didn't have a meatball sub and a steak bake for lunch!

When I was a kid, if I wanted something I knew there was zero chance of my parents signing off on it I would go on and on and on about it until they were so sick of hearing about it that they gave up and just let me get my way for some peace and quiet.

Now, this story about Brexit isn't true. But I feel like what it tells us about the Brexit campaign is.

Whilst cycling home, I came face-to-face with a family, all on (the frustratingly misleadingly-named) hoverboards, and I internally lamented the future that's been made for us.

I've been playing Animal Crossing: New Leaf with Tabitha. Everyone in my town was mad that they haven't seen their mayor for two years. I'm guessing they weren't too thrilled when I showed up, gave a load of money to my daughter, picked all the fruit and sold it, fished all the fish and sold them, caught all the bugs and sold them, dug a load of fossils and sold them, then added a couple of wings to my house.

One resident was so miffed, he moved to Tabitha's town almost immediately. A foolish move, since nepotism is almost always hereditary and we can probably assume that she's going to run her town in the same self-serving and negligent way that I've run mine.

I appear to have reached the part of my life that involves becoming obsessed with something for a short while, researching it, looking at endless photos, watching videos, trying stuff, then moving onto the next thing. So far, I've covered:

• Key organisation (I think I've completed this one)
• Pens (ongoing)
• Knives (this one sucks a bit in the UK)
• Torches
• Cameras (ongoing)
• Keyboards

I love learning about new things. Especially when there's a point I can get to where I'm happy with the knowledge I've accrued and I can move onto something new.

I feel like the next thing is going to be ways to prop my phone up for whatever reason. Lots of quarter-inch screws, cheese plates, and tripod leg stuff.

I'm going to be streaming again for a bit. I'm having so much fun with Hades, and the gameplay is so mad that watching back things I'm stuck on is really helpful, that even if when no-one watches it's worth doing.

The only mic I have right now is my Zoom, but I do have a lavalier that works with it so I might be able to get some decent audio. It's kinda jarring when I'm in a menu making a decision about some options but all you see is a frozen UI. Other than that it's probably just a lot of swearing. I don't like watching overly-chatty streamers, and I am not one.

Every now and again I'm like "I'm going to get into streaming", then I forget why I'm doing it or who I'm doing it for, or I stop playing the game that made me want to do it.

If watching me play video games appeals to you for whatever reason, you can subscribe to my Twitch and get notified when I'm playing. I have no schedule; I just play when I feel like it. I'll also upload my broadcasts to my YouTube if you want to skip through them and watch me suck. There's honestly no other reason to watch.

Jeffrey Lebowski listens to audio tapes of bowling matches and now you, the discerning keyboard enthusiast, can listen to typing sounds on some delightful mechanical keyboards. Not into vinyl? No matter, you can also listen on Spotify.

Disco Elysium will make a killing if it ever comes to the iPad.

But they'll probably bring it to Apple Arcade and I'll never play it because I'm sick of companies wanting an amount of money a month from me.