something of an existential crisis
06/01/2010
I guess this is the updated version of personal enrichment brought about by lack of TV; my mind has been being stimulated over the last couple of weeks. I've basically had an internet embargo going on, due to being busy with family stuff and a general unwillingness to go near my computer during my time off. It's been refreshing.
Fortunately or unfortunately, however, it's caused me to look at the way I use and abuse social networks and the repercussions that has on my relationships with people. Taking the most frequently accessed, Twitter and Facebook; there are times when I basically have nothing to say to people in real life because they already know everything that's going on in my life. They know that I tried and didn't like Starbucks, they know what song I like at the moment and they know what I'm doing this weekend. With some people, this starts a bit of dialogue that would, otherwise, not be there for lack of social networks, but it's really the same few people. That's not to say that I don't value the digital interactions I have with people, because I really do, but I feel sometimes like it cheapens physical encounters because there's nothing to talk about any more.
From this, I could go two ways, I suppose. Either stop using social networks in an attempt to try and personalise communication with people (as opposed to spitting in a crowd and seeing who gets wet), or stop seeing people in real life. There's obviously a happy medium somewhere in there, but I've never been good at finding that so I feel like I've reached a bit of a fork-in-the-road. What's more, is I feel like I've already made my decision. I've not posted to Facebook or Twitter for the last few days and I already feel like I'm having better interactions with people. I don't have to preface everything I say with "I don't know if you saw on Twitter, but...", which is rewarding in itself. And now, here I am having a characteristic, verbose brain dump with lots of words and no real structure.
If I was going to commit Web 2.0 Suicide, I wouldn't want to do it permanently. I've only used these networks to get back in touch with people I haven't seen for ages, or to continue talking to new people I meet - it would be counter productive. I think I'd try to be more graceful about it; leave a final message on each network with contact details and a desire to talk and hopefully stir up at least one proper conversation. Maybe I'm being non-commital and self-destructive (oxymoron?), but I keep feeling like the less effort you make to keep a relationship going, the less that relationship is worth. Social networks make relationships zero effort and, by extension, zero worth and I'm not satisfied with that.
Subject to major edits/rewrites/hypocrisy/reorders.