L'espirit d'escalier

I both love and hate this. It's a great way to get closure after an event, the outcome of which has already gone or is beyond your control. Being the incredibly witty fellow I am, I often miss out on l'espirit d'escalier, but if you're the sort of person who gets abuse shouted at you from cars, I imagine it's quite a frequent occurrence!

Returning from a jaunt, a delightful chap in a Chrysler Voyager wound his window down, especially to shout "pull your trousers up, you scruff" at me as he drove past (he didn't do it as I walked past whilst his car was stationary, by the way. I'm pretty dangerous-looking).

It wasn't until I was nearly home, having replayed the moment a thousand times already, each with me emerging the intellectual victor (and one time, doing a huge jump onto the roof of his car, punching through, pulling him out and throwing him under a bus. I should write a screenplay), it occurred to me: this contextually appropriate, piquant comeback, better than a million flip-kicks; "wouldn't that make it harder for you to kiss my ass?!".

When I tell people about this, you and I will know the true sequence of events, but everyone else will think I'm a quick-witted genius.