Fish Mingers (geddit?!)

Even in my meat-eating days, I wasn't a huge fan of fish. Every now and again, however, I would get this feeling that fish fingers were the best thing in the whole universe and I had to have a brown-bread-and-butter fish finger sandwich, stat. So I'd make one and be really excited, eat it, then want to vomit my skull out of my mouth because fish fingers are gross.

Naturally, when Charlotte announced that Quorn makes "fish" fingers, I was intrigued. I haven't eaten "real" fish fingers in maybe 8 years, so this was quite a tempting prospect. They look like real fish fingers (seriously, though, how hard was that to do?) and they smell fishy when they're cooking, but they're basically this breaded, stale-tasting paste stuff. They're truly vulgar. If I ever think that eating them will be a good idea in future (and I will), someone remind me about this so I don't do it again. Thanks.