Do you ever get this, where you look at the things you love and you feel such overwhelming joy that you couldn't possibly feel more full, more successful, more contented than you do? And then you look at those same things and you feel like a complete charlatan; so undeserving, like an impostor walked into someone else's life unnoticed, and you're waiting for someone to detect your unwelcome presence and all that's left is to watch everything you know you don't deserve come crashing down at your feet. It seems unfair that you can swing from one to the other so easily, without even noticing that anything happened. Especially as frequently as this. This is maybe not the best outlet for this.